10 Things to Never Say to a Mom of Boys

10 Things To Never Tell Moms of Boys


**ETA: Well, “never” is a strong word.  Most of these don’t really bother me that much but I hear them a lot.  At least 2 or 3 of these every time I dare venture out into the big world with my crew.

#1  “You sure have your hands full.” Yes, yes I do.

#2  “Trying for a girl?”  Nope.  I have 4 boys because I wanted all of my kids.  We might have more even but not because we want a girl.  Girls scare me.  I was one.  I don’t begrudge anyone for trying for a girl as long as they love their boys equally.

#3  “You know there are tricks for tipping the odds for a girl.” Yeah, they don’t always work.  And please refer to #2.

#4  “Forming your own basketball team?” Sure, why not.  Maybe we’ll go for a football team.

#5  “Are they all yours?” I guess the fact that my kids don’t really look a like spurs this questions.  A dark blonde, a brunette, a red head and a light brunette. Blue eyes, brown eyes, green eyes.  They even have different skin tones!  Kind of makes me want to have more kids just to see what we can come up with.

#6  “You look tired.” No duh. Thanks for noticing. Where’s my coffee?  Are you offering to babysit so I can take a nap?

#7  “Do you know how much teen boys eat?!”  We’re not quite there but I’m starting to get scared.  Right now a grocery trip requires 2 carts filled to the brim.

#8  “Wow, your house is a mess!”  Did you really need to alert my attention to that?  Do you think I don’t notice?  I will have plenty of time when they are grown up and gone to have my perfect house.  Right now I choose happiness, sanity and my kids over an immaculate house.  My motto is “Clean enough to be healthy, dirty enough to be happy.”  I do admit we fall to the very happy side more than the clean side.  But my boys are happy!  Are you offering to watch the kids while I sort toys (because you know I can’t do that with them around) or offering to help clean?

#9  “Are your boys always like this?”  This refers to crazy, bad, wild and so on.  First of all, curious and active does not equal bad.  Are they always this curious and active?  Nope, they do have to sleep sometime.  At home when it’s only me,  it’s usually not too chaotic.  The younger ones especially like to put on a show for people.  I avoid situation where they have to be on their best behavior because I know that is just tempting fate.  You can’t expect a 2 yo to behave in an odd, not what they’re used to, overstimulating situation.  And spanking them or yelling at them will only make things worse.  So rather than giving me a look of consternation, how about a look of sympathy or ask “Is there anything I can do to help?”

#10  “I’m so glad I have girls.”  Yeah, come back and tell me that when they are all in full hormonal distress.  At the same time.  Who’s laughing now?




12 comments to 10 Things to Never Say to a Mom of Boys

  • On the flip side…having two older girls I would constantly get comments (at those rare moment when they were actually well behaved). You have such good children! Aren’t you glad you had girls? Or really any comment along the lines that my having girls made my job easier. I can tell you now with a boy that is all boy…it’s not harder…just different. I’m more impressed with the number of kids than the sex. ;). And you know that if your house is clean…someone will comment that you must not spend time with your kids…

    Loved the list. :)

  • Melanie

    Exactly, not harder, just different.

  • I have 4 boys and 1 girl. She is right smack in the middle. Lucky her! I do pity any boys who show interest in her but I figure that if that boy can get thru 2 older brothers, 2 younger brothers, and daddy that he might just be worthy of her attention. I always hated people asking me what I hoped for when I was pregnant after I got a boy the first time. All I wanted was a healthy baby LOL!

  • Ashory

    I have two of each, and both genders are equally difficult. They’re currently 10, 11, 14, and 17. I, too, get #s 1, 4, 5, and 6 when I’m out and about with mine. Apparently, large families are threatening in some way, and certain people think that they’re superior for being either childless or having their “perfect” one or two.

  • Jeff

    I have a 2.5 year old boy and a girl on the way in a few months. As a cadet, I’m far more afraid of having a girl, because boys agree familiar territory (I grew up in a house with only a younger brother). But gender has nothing to do with good or bad behaviour. Some of the most ill-behaved children I know are girls. It has much more to do with the situation and the parents’ approach to discipline. In your situation, I think that you have the right approach… In a one-on-one situation it’s much easier to guide and correct. With four, it would be impossible to give proper, loving guidance without resorting to yelling or spanking, you just can’t spread yourself that thinly. Good ideas, then, to stick Tom situations where the kids can be kids and not disrupt others. And as they grow up, they will be learning the skills that they need to be on their best behaviour, because you’re still taking them out and teaching them how to behave, in appropriate situations. If I had a large gang I’d probably do the same. Love your blog and keep it up!

  • Elena

    I only have one son and since having him I have said more then once I would love all boys. Your right about the the house being a mess and I don’t care for a second, I’m having fun playing Star Wars or digging for fossils.

  • Camryn

    I have six kids, 5 boys and 1 girl, and I can say that having all of my boys first and then having my girl was probably a life saver for me. Sometimes I get annoyed with people when they say that my little girl looks like a boy or acts too much like a boy, what do they expect, she has 5 older brothers. But I do agree with Sheree that I pity any boy who has to get through her daddy and then 5 older brothers, but I guess he would have to be deserving to do so.

  • […] a rant post but rather a “think before you speak” post. I did address this in my post 10 Things to Never Say to Moms of Boys but this one in particular I think needs extra […]

  • I have one boy, thus far. I can say that I am so happy I don’t have a girl. I’ve seen the toys that encourage them to be (or at least dress like) a hooker, shows that encourage them to be naive and just ignorant, and clothes that are not age appropriate. I am so thankful that I have a boy. It’s just easier to keep him in God’s light at a younger age. Can’t wait to see what puberty brings. :)

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